the onion
Will Faught
May 2011
142 Plane Crash Victims Were Statistically More Likely To Have Died In A Car Crash
My thoughts exactly. Fear of a plane crash isn’t irrational; it’s fearing the lack of control, which you don’t have in a plane crash.
1 minute
March 2011
February 2009
Former eBay CEO Running For Governor Best quotation: “This would be a great idea if California were eBay.” Arizona Super Bowl Viewers Shown Pornography Best quotation: “That was the only part of the Super Bowl that I understood.”
1 minute
March 2007
The Onion’s Article Titles Are The Best Part
Honestly, I think I enjoy the titles of The Onion articles more than the actual articles. For example: Actress’ Abortion Written Into TV Show High School Student Council Passes Nonbinding Resolution Kindergartner Being Groomed For Line-Leader Position Unreleased Jimmy Page Guitar Riff To Be Retrieved From Secret Vault To Save Rock And Roll Anchor Ad-Libs News With 97 Percent Accuracy
funny life quotations reflections the onion titles
1 minute